Saturday, March 24, 2007

HOLLYWOOD HUMORINGS
So last night, I really wanted to go to see Cheeseburger, but my car's a piece of crap right now and I was sitting at home when Cuso called to see if I was going anywhere. So, I ended up going to Teddy's...yeah. Oh boy. I've never gone to Teddy's just because, well it's super LA...super hoite toite or whatever. But I went for lack of anything else to do and at least I could hang with some friends. And oh...the amusing fun it was! First off, I ended up running in to Cisco again when I heard someone yelling "Airport!!" at me. Seeing how we saw each other about 10 times on the way home from SXSW, my nickname is now apparently 'Airport'. Next, while sipping on my $13 cocktail, which fortunately I didn't pay for, Amy Winehouse walks by and I chat with her for a second. Next thing I know, some girl brushes by her and says her music sucks. And damn, Winehouse smashed the broad on the head!! I really thought chaos was about to break out but someone got the madness under control and Winehouse got to stay and play. Next, Kaps showed up with my friend Jana and then a second cocktail was in session, especially after I discovered another chap was practically my high school neighbor back in Boston. Dang! Now it's getting really good....the place is packed...people are tipsy and Holmes is spinning. I go to a separate patio and have a bunch of people I know run up to me asking me if I 'got in.' I'm confused until I realize being at Teddy's and getting in to Teddy's is a Hollywood 'big deal'. I go back inside with my fancy invisible hand stamp. I've now moved onto third cocktail and am running into a bunch of friends I haven't seen in a while. Next, I notice a guy who really thinks he must be Jason Biggs, he looks like him and even takes it to the next level of dressing like him. I point it out to Kaps and he agrees. But 30mins later we're still baffled by this guy. Maybe it is Biggs? I sit down next to him to find out. 2 minutes later he introduces himself as Jason. Damn it! It is Biggs...and this whole time we'd be mocking him as a poser, of himself. But the best part is he was hamming it up with Eva Longoria. Weird. I chat with Maria and Cisco tells me I'm the DJ's muse. I don't know what to say to him. Next I notice the dude from American Pie who gets it on with Stiflers Mom. This is hilarious because I can only picture him on the toilet. Biggs is drunk and I'm trying not to laugh and then all of a sudden, he sneaks out through the crowd with Eva. Yep...Biggs and Longoria off together. See how long it takes for that to make it US Weekly. Ouch.
The rest of the night was pretty entertaining, fancy fashion and pricey drinks. Chandeliers and dungeon decor. I headed out early and walked what I guessed to be about 10 blocks home...needless to say it was more like 75. I treated myself to some 3am french toast and passed out before my head even hit the pillow. That was enough Hollywood for me.

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