ROBOT D

I hate February, therefore I wrote nothing for that entire month. But now it's March. It's nearly springtime and things have started to pick up speed again. Yes, it's SXSW season. But before I even launch myself into that onslaught of a party in the desert, I've dropped myself here back in sunny Los Angeles where I'm pretty sure I got a faint suntan from walking to the coffee shop. I'm back in LA for a bit, first doing an installation for The Standard Hollywood and then playing a Biker Daughter show at Franki Chan's CYP2 with The Deathset and Ninjasonik. This is my third installation, and the fucked up thing is as a visual artist, when it comes to full on sculptures, painting, design, I never know what I'm really doing until I start doing it. Let's just say I've spent the first half of today studying iconic robot images and getting way too immersed in robotic sciences. I also picked up a few books.

So Monday, I'll be adorning the Standard with whatever my mind sees as fit. And then the following night I'll be hanging from the rafters in front of a Los Angeles crowd. And then the party really kicks into overdrive. . . and my skin'll be bronzed by the end of the Austin blitz.

I'm not really sure what I'm getting myself into otherwise, maybe a few Hefeweizens. Perhaps a couple of burrito stands or taco trucks. Most definitely an evening with Fake Blood and the IAMSOUND family. Oh, and plenty of immersion in the Vitamin D. Now I find myself wondering how long it'll be before they have a robot that also runs off solar energy. He could be soaking up some Vita-D too. Me and Robot D, cruising the scene. I'm pretty sure this dude exists. Time will tell.

GROGGY ROBOT
So I had a dream about aliens last night, so naturally it's all I can think about first thing when I wake up and for about the first couple hours of my morning. Now, keeping in mind I have yet to have my coffee, I am just gonna throw it out there. My sleepy little head came to the concept that aliens are simply a futuristic human. Am I moving from robots to aliens? I'm talking light years ahead, metamorphasized and shit. Or maybe not. But that was what I woke up thinking. Then I also thought, how could people not think they existed. Um, hello UFO conference and ancient Mayans. And not to mention, if we still don't even understand or aren't even aware of over half of what is in our ocean alone, how will we ever fully grasp what is in the galaxy or space when it's a million times larger than our little bodies of water. Maybe aliens are gooey robots? But...I guess all in all, robots and aliens sort of go hand in hand. At least in this little 48hour movie...haha. It's so ridiculous I have to watch it again. "Robot, quit fooling around!"



On another note, I'm ready for my coffee. And I'm all over Lisa Loeb's Stay and The Knack's My Sharona. Hello Best Buy...cuz I'm about to pick me up some Reality Bites or A Life Less Ordinary. Someone send over some UFO photos...maybe throw in a little Lochness too.

THE REAL T2
As much of a fan I am for robots, its the cute lil wind up guys or the roll around and dance with you bots that I fancy. Of course the old school bots who could maybe just push you around a bit in harmless fun are great too. But when it comes to a robot who is specifically designed for termination, well shit, haven't we all watched that film a dozen times. I recall staying home non sick from school as a kid and watching it daily (along with a few other classics such as Adventures in Babysitting)...but seriously...we all should have learned a lesson or two from the 80's hit. Don't make a robot that knows how to throw grenades, order guns, shoot the shit and maintain a great view through nightvision. But guess what, it may not come in the cyborg flesh the Terminator we know was so well endowed with, but it's only a matter of time; because the Talon Swat Bot is here. Danger, Danger Will Robinson!! The real T2 has come to life, and I can only surmise that within in a couple of years he'll be policing your neighborhood for 'protection'.
Check this...the Talon Bot comes with:
- a Multi-shot TASER electronic control device with laser-dot aiming
("can you say phase plasma rifle in the 40 watt range?" Cause that's what T2 was rockin' in the gunstore).
- Loudspeaker and audio receiver for negotiations
(Sara Conner? Pft. Negotiation my ass).
- Night vision and thermal cameras
(You know, to detect the body temps at night an such).
- Choice of weapons for lethal or less-than-lethal responses
(Bots need options too).
- 40 mm grenade launcher - 2 rounds
(Cause 2 rounds oughtta do the trick).
- 12-gage shotgun - 5 rounds (Really guy, really?)
- FN303 less-lethal launcher - 15 rounds
(It's less lethal, so he gets 15 rounds).

Shit dude...read the rest here.

MY JOHNNY 5
IS ALIVE! And for freakin' sale on ebay?! What the hell has come of the planet...where my bot is selling on ebay for tons of bank? Whoever would sell such a kick ass robot? Shit man, he'd be greeting guests and tearing it up on the dancefloor with me.
Can we start a fundraiser to save Johnny 5 from ebay!? I will love him and cherish him forever....
pffft...and we all thought he short circuited. He'll be toolin' around on Hollywood Blvd. in no time!

JOHNNY 5...IS ALIVE!!!

BEST BOTS
So...besides the fact that I really hit a new level of nerd and obtained my first voice activated robot...a 2ft tall R2D2, there have been some amazing bots kicking around as of late. First of all, Daft Punk made me almost swoon and pass out for amazing bot overload. I can't wait to see them again in Chicago. Knees will hit ground instantaneously for sure.
Furthermore, there's this adorable flick coming out next year that pretty much already won me over...this Wall-E looks like a robot ET, and I'm a total sucker for ET. Oh daaang! Seriously, just listen to the cute buggers voice at the end and you'll get all tickled.



And more goodies!!! Last nights Seven party was out of control, no kidding. And so therein lies my final favorite robot for the week...amazingness: